Andy Young: Keeping up with the Joneses

By Andy Young

The National Football League Players Association has filed a grievance on behalf of Christian Wilkins, a defensive tackle who has been released by the Las Vegas Raiders.

I have no interest in the brutal business of professional football or in the Raiders, who last time that I cared were calling Oakland home. I’m guessing Mr. Wilkins won’t starve though, since $84.75 million of the four-year, $110 million contract he signed in March of 2024 was guaranteed.

What caught my eye was the reason for the grievance. The NFLPA contends the Raiders are attempting to void the contract of an injured player, an action that is not only reprehensible, but also against the rules.

Mr. Wilkins is currently physically unable to perform due to his slow recovery from surgery to repair a Jones fracture.

What? You’ve never heard of a Jones fracture? Don’t feel bad. Neither had I.

A Jones fracture occurs at the base of the fifth metatarsal bone, which is on the outside of the foot. It can be caused by the sorts of repetitive stress professional athletes, particularly large ones, put on their bodies, and recovering from surgery on it is difficult, since the bone has a limited blood supply. Numerous NFL players, including current stars Derrick Henry and Deebo Samuel, have sustained Jones fractures, as has basketball superstar Keven Durant and more than two dozen other prominent NBA players.

What I want to know is who the Jones Fracture was named after. There are plenty of candidates, as “Jones” is the fifth-most common surname in the United States, behind only Smith, Johnson, Williams, and Brown.

It’s natural to assume that the first to sustain such an injury was an athlete, given the constant stress they put on their feet. Could the original Jones fracture have been suffered by Sam or K.C. Jones, two key members of the dynastic Boston Celtics teams of the 1950s and 1960s? And if not one of them, how about Caldwell, Wil, Major, or Charles Jones, four large brothers who played basketball for Albany (Georgia) State University before launching NBA careers of varying lengths. It’s not unlikely a basketball player was the first to suffer this particular injury since no fewer than 118 men (and at least 10 women) named Jones have played the sport professionally.

But then, it could be one of the 145 Joneses who’ve played major league baseball, or one of the 352, including seven Mikes, five Davids, four Willies, three Rods, two Victors, a Buddha, a Pacman, a Deacon, a Too-Tall, a Spike, and a Tebucky who’ve played in the National Football League.

Could Shirley Jones have fallen off a stage while dancing in Oklahoma, Carousel, or The Music Man, or during a taping of an episode of The Partridge Family? Maybe John Paul Jones tripped while declaring “I have not yet begun to fight,” during a memorable battle in British waters in 1779. Could it have been Davy Jones while on tour with The Monkees? Grace Jones tipping over when her hair got too heavy on one side? Carolyn Jones while performing a stunt as Morticia in an episode of the Addams Family? Terry Jones of Monty Python’s Flying Circus? James Earl Jones while voicing Darth Vader? Tommy Lee Jones? Catherine Zeta-Jones? Quincy Jones, or one of his daughters, Rashida or Kidada?

Okay. The Jones Fracture was named for … drum roll … Sir Robert Jones, a British doctor who first described the injury in 1902 after he himself sustained one while … dancing!

So there. And shame on those of you who pooh-poohed the possibility of the Jones fracture originating with Shirley while she danced. <