Friday, August 16, 2024

Insight: Comic Book Gags-R-Us

By Ed Pierce
Managing Editor


When I was growing up in the 1960s, I anxiously would await each month for the arrival of new comic books. The stories and artwork were fantastic, and I would read each edition from cover to cover. My favorite feature every month was always the gag and novelty advertisements listing a dazzling array of objects available only by mail order and not commonly sold in stores.

There were phony arm casts for $1.50 making it appear like you had a broken arm, bars of soap for 40 cents that would leave your skin a bright shade of green, trick packs of chewing gum for 20 cents for sharing with friends that came in “spearmint wrappers” but tasted like onions, garlic or hot peppers, and $1 packets of sea monkeys which when added to water would eventually grow into tiny living sea creatures.

For just 50 cents you could purchase a “joy buzzer,” which was a ring that you could wear that would deliver a “shocking sensation” when someone shook your hand. Then there was a “Silent Dog Whistle” for $1 that could not be heard by human ears but only by Rover.

For $1 you could receive a free book revealing the secrets of Jiu-Jitsu or a 20-course home study program detailing the 20 best karate moves.

The sort of items appearing in these clever promotions for kids included See Behind Spectacles, a specially treated pair of sunglasses containing secret mirrors that enabled you to see behind you without anyone knowing you’re watching for 75 cents, or a Werewolf Horror Mask for $1.98 made of rubber for year-round use and not just at Halloween.

Merchandise offered for under 25 cents included marked playing cards, an instruction pamphlet to teach you how to throw your voice, packets of magic pellets that would turn into worms when placed in someone’s drink, and a brochure promising to unveil the mysterious secrets of hypnosis to convince anyone to do something they normally wouldn’t do.

My favorite of all these comic book novelty ads was X-Ray spectacles for $1, which promised that you could put them on and be able to see things you weren’t supposed to see. This ad suggested that based upon an optical illusion you could view bones in your hand or even peer underneath whatever someone was wearing at a party. I was always too chicken to ever purchase this item because I didn’t want someone to put them on and see underneath my clothes.

Priced at just 60 cents, you could send away for an authentic Australian boomerang billed as “the latest thing in target throwing.” Or for $1.98 you could own a rugged 12-inch by 24-inch vinyl inflatable pillow adorned with a photo of Raquel Welch. For 75 cents, you could order a speedometer for the handlebars of your bicycle to tell how fast you were riding.

There were tiny space-age walkie-talkies, a fake camera that a rubber snake would pop out of when you snapped someone’s photo, 25-cent joke rubber hot dogs, or lifelike rubber mice, caterpillars and cockroaches or a wig worn to make you appear to be bald all for 88 cents.

My brother once ordered a rubber doggy do-do pile for 50 cents to play a trick on our father, while a few months later, I ordered what was called a “Whoopi Cushion” to play a joke on my mother. When placed under her seat at the breakfast table, it released an embarrassing sound resembling a quacking duck.

It was truly an adolescent prankster’s dream. You could purchase a set of “chattering teeth” or a “trick baseball” that could not be thrown straight no matter how hard you tried, a “secret pocket pen radio,” fake traffic tickets, cherry colored smoke bombs, a can of shave cream that wouldn’t stop spilling out lather when the button was released, fake rubber bullet holes, or a makeup kit to create fake black eyes or fake bleeding wounds.

For $2 you could build huge muscles fast or develop a body like Charles Atlas. For $1.50 you would learn the secrets of how to lose weight or purchase undetectable shoe lifts to fit any size and make yourself appear taller. For 15 cents you could order a bottle of magic disappearing ink to fool your friends or for just 50 cents you could purchase a book that could teach you how to play the harmonica or a “secret book safe” for storing valuable items and containing a combination lock which could be placed undetected on a bookshelf with other books.

Magic tricks were plentiful with everything from what was called a “moneymaker,” in which a blank piece of paper could be inserted, a handle pulled and out would pop a $1 bill to sneezing powder to an ordinary looking scarf that would mysteriously change colors if you knew how to operate it.

In this current day and age, I suppose a person looking for a gag or novelty item can visit the gift store at the mall or stroll through the nearest flea market. But way back when the only way to buy gum that turned your teeth black was on the back page of a comic book. <

No comments:

Post a Comment