Andy Young: Where to take a domestic world tour

By Andy Young

Bangor. Bath. Berwick. Bristol. Freeport. Moscow. Newry. Strong. Windsor.

Pine Creek Gorge in Pennsylvania is rated as one of the
most scenic locations in the Keystone State.
COURTESY PHOTYO

There’s plenty for visitors to see in Maine. However, a summer isn’t nearly enough time to experience everything that’s special about America’s nominal Vacationland.

But imagine trying to explore multiple far-flung places outside of northern New England. Does any traveler possess the wherewithal necessary to see Wyoming, Oklahoma, Indiana, and California during a single summer? Ditto for Denver, Oakland, Dallas, Houston, Austin, Knoxville, Akron and Palo Alto, not to mention foreign locales like Dublin, Lima, Berlin, Hanover, Heidelberg, Halifax, Newfoundland, and Yukon. Even doing justice to comparatively nearby attractions like Cooperstown or Shenandoah would be challenging. And imagine the difficulty of accessing places like Athens, Alexandria or Egypt. No one can realistically expect to see all those places in just one summer.

Unless they have a reliable car, and a map of Pennsylvania.

Every location listed above exists in the Keystone State of Pennsylvania. There is also a Cumberland County there, plus places called Lincoln, Knox, Washington, Hancock, Oxford, Somerset, York and Franklin. That’s nine of Maine’s 16 counties Pennsylvania’s got covered. But where’s Waldo? Alas, not there. There’s also no Penobscot, Androscoggin, Kennebec, Sagadahoc, Aroostook, or Piscatiquis in PA. However, having 56 percent of one state’s counties’ namesakes within another’s borders is no small feat.

Presidential scholars no doubt appreciate the Pennsylvania communities of Washington, Adams, Jefferson, Madison, Monroe, Jacksonville, Polk, Taylor, Lincoln, Johnsonburg, Wilson, Hooversville, Nixon, Kennedy Township, Ford City, Bushkill Falls, and Clintonville. And it’s likely they’re on pins and needles in Harrisburg, the state capital, and Harrisville, a Butler County community of 802 residents, awaiting the results of this fall’s election.

City people undoubtedly enjoy Philadelphia, Pittsburgh, and Erie. But Pennsylvania also contains Broad Top City, Dickson City, Tower City, Central City, Ellwood City, Evans City, Fayette City, Forest City, Grove City, Homer City, Karns City, Lake City and Mahanoy City.

Those turned off by cities can check out Allentown, Norristown, Johnstown, Doylestown, Middletown, Elizabethtown, Jugtown, Quakertown, Snydertown, Watsontown and scores of other towns. And those who prefer even tinier places can explore some of Pennsylvania’s numerous villes, which include Monroeville, Gilbertsville, Schnecksville, Cherryville, Alleghenyville, Plumsteadville, Schwenksville, Montoursville, Factoryville, Meadville, Pottsville, Lionville, Normalville, Ohioville, Titusville, Phoenixville and my personal favorite, Youngsville. There’s also a Unionville, which seems only fair, since there’s also a Union City and a Uniontown.

Pennsylvania contains multiple burgs, including Greensburg, Stroudsburg, Bloomsburg, Mechanicsburg, Blossburg, Hollidaysburg, and the utterly irresistible Wormleysburg. And boaters can, one assumes, drop anchor in Williamsport, Bridgeport, Glassport, Smethport, or Walnutport.

Fun fact: Pennsylvania’s got two towns named Liberty. There are also two separate Newburgs, Centervilles, Coaldales, Jeffersons, and Pleasantvilles.

The state’s numerous colorful communities include Red Lion, Blue Bell, White Haven, Brownstown, Orangeville and Greencastle. It can also boast of having Economy, Freedom, Liberty, Industry, Progress and Paradise. And there’s plenty that’s modern there, including New Britain, New Buffalo, New Baltimore, New Paris, New Philadelphia, New Salem, New Washington, and 22 other “New” municipalities.

There are undoubtedly some great stories behind how each Pennsylvania community was dubbed. For starters, consider places like Moosic, Flying Hills, Arnot, Hop Bottom, Mars, Yoe, Slickville, Cokeburg and Wampum. The origins of some town names are probably self-evident, like Limestone, Cherry Tree, Turtle Creek, Slippery Rock, Sinking Spring, and Shade Gap.

But in the interests of decency, morality and rectitude, it’s probably advisable not to explore exactly where, when and how Black Lick, Sugar Notch, Intercourse, Blue Ball, Beavertown and Manns Choice got their names.

Hmmmm.

Come to think of it, perhaps it’s best not to examine the derivation of the word “rectitude” too closely, either. <