Running
was once a part of my early morning exercise routine. Now, I am taking up walking
instead. I’ve been halfheartedly resisting this change because I’m not quite
ready to “grow old gracefully.” I’d rather be the type who “skids broadside
into the grave all worn out”. But when push finally comes to shove, I decide to stick
to my relaxed morning saunter despite the torment I put myself through.
On
one of my particularly guilt-ridden days when I was trying to coax myself back
into running, it dawned on me why I was enjoying my newfound workout. There is
something about slowing down that is calming. The thing I have noticed about my
morning walks is that I get the opportunity to stop and talk to other walkers
and, often, get to meet their dogs too. I even get to learn about the
personality, affections and eating habits of my four-legged neighbors.
I
am beginning to realize there is so much I missed when I ran. And, come to
think about it, I run all day every day from meeting to meeting, so I could use
this time of slowing down end enjoy the scenery. But some mornings, I still
think I “should” be running.
Guilt?
Why do I feel this guilt about slowing the pace of my daily exercise routine? I
can understand feeling responsible for eating too many donuts or being mean to my
friends - but this?
It
seems guilt can play a role in our lives when it really has no place or serves
no purpose. We wonder if we are a good enough parent when we let our children
eat French fries for dinner, we feel ashamed when we watch too much TV, we are
remorseful when we don’t make a phone call to a friend or when we say “no” to a
volunteer invitation.
But
it wasn’t until I read a recent Facebook conversation that I realized that unnecessary
guilt can go too far. In a post by my friend, she shared this quote: “When you
are resting, because you are worn out, you need to remember that you are not
wasting the day doing nothing. You are doing exactly what you need to do. You
are recovering.”
A
friend of hers responded by saying: “I did that yesterday. I took some time to
rest – and then I apologized for it.” Her reply shocked me enough, acting as a lightning
bolt – helping me to see my own misconstrued feelings of irrational thinking.
Author and psychologist,
Leon
F Seltzer Ph.D. stated that unjustified guilt has been linked to needless emotional suffering…. “So,
unless guilt feelings are actually necessary for you to take
appropriate responsibility for a significant misdeed such feelings don’t really
serve you or anyone.”
Seltzer
offers suggestions to turn the tide of pointless guilt around and it all boils
down to accepting yourself and your own personal successes. Additionally,
recognizing the good things that come from what we do and who we are – letting
go of perceived perfections is important to our happiness.
So, tomorrow – I will
put on my walking shoes and will enjoy the smells, the sights, the sounds, the
people and the dogs I will meet along the way – totally guilt-free. Even if it
means growing old gracefully.
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