Andy Young: The necessity of all five vowels

By Andy Y.

Exactly how many people on this planet speak English cannot be determined precisely, or at least not for certain. The total, according to Wikipedia, an online encyclopedia where many folks go to obtain esoteric information, is somewhere in the neighborhood of 1.5 billion. However, if that seems a bit inflated, well, it is. For the majority of Earth’s denizens, English never has been and never will be their primary method of sharing ideas. 

A mere 360 million earthlings consider it their primary form of expression. Others converse (or trade opinions) by employing Spanish, French, Mandarin, Arabic, Farsi, or Hindi. These are only a few of the many other systems of engaging in verbal or written interactions by employing a common system of terminology. English is, for many people, at best a secondary method of engaging in conversation and/or written correspondence with others.

While there are 26 letters in the alphabet, five are widely considered more important than all the others. Were it not for vowels, words, phrases, and sentences as we know them might not exist. Imagine trying to clearly convey a vital message, verbally or in writing, if speakers, writers, and all other creators of oral and written transmission of ideas didn’t have those five most important letters of the alphabet at their disposal!

Even professionals who examine books, articles, words and sentences for a living can’t effectively analyze controversies related to literary topics if they’re limited to availing themselves solely of mere consonants.

Make no mistake: this analytical commentary is not intended as a jab at the letters B, C, D, F, G, H, J, K, L, M, N, P, Q, R, S, T, V, W, X, Y, and/or Z. These twenty-one easily recognizable symbols have served English speakers with clarity, honor and distinction for more than one and a half millennia, and it’s likely they’ll persist in doing so for at least that long into whatever period of time lies ahead for mankind. Consider for a moment the prospect of a vowel-less world. It’d definitely be a wretched one, since there’d be severe limitations regarding the capability of men, women, and children to know what anyone else was thinking at any given time or place.

If it weren’t for vowels there’d be no viable way to attempt to compose even a brief letter, to say nothing of lengthier written pieces like this one, which consists of a mere fifty dozen words. Can anyone fathom a life devoid of the alphabet’s five-letter assemblage of vowels?

If these five splendid letters didn’t exist, there’d be no effective form of oral or written expression available to anyone. Imagine trying to relay messages with only hand signals or facial expressions, while emitting only snorts or groans. We’d have to “baaah” like rams or ewes, and assign meanings to words like zvmmt, kwrss, pklxz, or qmkllffs! I don’t see that as being even a remote possibility.

Crafting a viable, coherent dissertation while deprived of even one specific vowel doesn’t seem doable. Composing a 600-word article that doesn’t contain each of them at least once is inconceivable even for me, and I’ve got an exceptionally healthy imagination. I’m really glad nobody ever assigned me to write a lengthy treatise on the importance of vowels, while at the same time prohibiting me from employing a specific one even once. To decent writers, each vowel is of vital importance.

Thank goodness for these five essential letters. I can’t imagine writing an essay sans any A’s, E’s, I’s, or O’s. It’s simply not attainable for me.

Nevertheless, it might be achievable for someone else.

Maybe even yew. <